Wednesday, January 9

Ranting in Reverse - Koko Concert 2012

I am just remembering all the things that annoyed me in my time of hiatus on this blog, and Koko Concert (Mr. Dbanj the axxhole) was the highlight of it all.

The 3 ONLY reasons why i even begged my hubby to purchase the tickets was because of Idris Elba, 2face and Wizkid. Idris Elba was the 'host'of the event as marketed.

The show was scheduled to start 7pm which we all know in naija should be max 9pm (at least so i thought). I didn't care because i really wanted a good place to sit (notice i said sit) even before the show started so i urged my hubby and we got there by 7:30pm. First of all the road to the venue was a never ending journey right there on the beach of Eko Atlantic, i didn't care because where i was going to was more important than all that. As we arrived and finally parked (i wont say that story) we walked towards the venue only for us to see hundreds of people outside the gate.. this was already 8ish. Ahn ahn, whats going on please? the venue wasn't fully ready yet so no one could go in...huh??? Ok now. I went with my hubby and 3 of my girlfriends, so we just took our time to diss the youngins around us (it was a show that had Big Sean who is what 23?? so a lot of kids were there, trust me even 12yr olds were at that place) We were just being funny and naughty. Then at the corner of my eye i saw a truck offloading speakers!! At past 8PM they were just offloading speakers...from that moment i was already wanting to go back home, but i couldn't say this to my hubby lol..i too beg for that ticket abeg.. i frustrated him into buying it for that matter.

I guess they realized that outside was almost turning into a stadium so they decided to let people in. they asked for 2 lines - 1 for regular and the other for VIP. This was when all the fonee speaking pple's hands fell right close to mine lmaoooo! There were only 2 people on the VIP line...regular line was from here all the way to heaven lmao!!! (yes i was on the regular line...and so? it was 5k please). We sha entered o and we were positioned right in front of the stage wooohoooo! I was so so happy, the VIP peeps were wayyy behind and VVIP were up to our right. Now here comes the shocker...there were no seats for us in regular. This wouldn't have been a problem at all if the show had started immediately because your feet are moving and you're jumping, adrenaline pumpin and all that....let me tell you, the DJ started playing music, and for 4 hours straight the DJ was the show :( i was beyond feet were chest was paining me...i kept sitting on the ground to regain some strength...ah ah ah it was horrible!!!

Then at 12 midnight Basketmouth and Bovi came on the stage..ooook, they are cool, funny and all, but where the hell is Idris Elba please? He is the "HOST"right??? These 2 comedians cracked successful jokes for another hour or so which were truly funny, so that made me happy a bit, but i just kept wondering when the host would come out. To cut the long story short, Basketmouth and Bovi hosted this show...the whole thing. Idris Elba did come out, but even a hype man was on stage longer than him. He ran to the stage when people were screaming for him at about 2:30am (when so many idiots had performed) and then he introduced Tinie Tempah, Big Sean and Dbanj when they were to perform. I was disgusted by this that i wasn't even slightly excited whenever he "popped" up on the stage.

The 2nd and biggest f**k up was that Tuface and Wizkid didn't come to that event. i didn't even know how to react. i felt like climbing that stage and giving Dbanj hot slaps and biting him all over. Wicked basturd! Dbanj's performance was the worst of the night and i am not lying. People started leaving the moment he spent 15minutes on stage asking us to beg the VVIP people that they should not be angry with him. arrant nonsense. What a failure

The show was a flop...30/100 is what i grade it...i'm grading 30 because Tinie Tempah, Big Sean and our Nigerian artists lit up the stage and managed to still have me singing and dancing for a while after all i had gone through that night. The after-party of that show was the walk of life people had to walk to their cars and some to the main gate lmao! hilarious. i didn't walk for too long sha but i sat in traffic for a while at 4am to get out of the blaady place lol.

The show was on the 27th of Dec. As God would have it (knowing fully well that i really needed to see Tuface perform "Ihe Neme" in this my lifetime and i'm not interested in going for shows ever again), on the night of the 31st/1st after church, my hubby and i branched at the Lagos State countdown stuff they did on the beach (old Kuramo) and without spending a kobo or standing for long, i saw my Tuface perform :) i was so so happy. Tuface is the greatest Nigerian artist ever.

Lmao! jus had to put this up for no reason


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