Friday, November 5

Goldfish like me...smh

So I have a very short memory- like my friend Feyi would say, my memory span is like that of a goldfish (3 seconds if u were wondering). How sad. What’s more sad is that she’s right. She is absolutely right…*sigh*. Something major happened to me around 2004, and I only remember this because my friend Dolapo had to replay the scenario for about 15 minutes then it came back to me vaguely. Lemme narrate this thing for u guys then you can see for yourselves how severe my problem is.

When my family was still living in bar beach towers (that was before the bloody government evicted everyone, one dark cold morning- 3am to be precise- phookin ass wipes), my friend and I were walking in the estate maybe for a stroll or something, can’t really remember…anyways, we were walking down, and the next thing that happened, a man came falling from the 10th floor! 10th FLOOR!! For those of you that don’t know, bar beach towers has 12 floors, then there is this extension thing on the first floor where people station their DSTV satellite dish, so as the man was falling, he bounced on the edge of that extension, with his kneecap, and landed 3feet from me and my friend..MY GOD! His head squashed, his kneecap out, his bones broken (see goosebumps as I type). At that moment, I felt all the pains of that fall in every part of my body. My brain went dead for a few seconds. Funny thing is my friend didn’t feel the effect as much as I did, as a matter of fact, she helped me back home and I was traumatized for like 2 days. Sounds like one Nigerian film I know, but I’m telling you this was something I experienced! Till today I do not know if he was pushed or if he fucked himself over (Nigerians don’t commit suicide na! suffering and smiling is our motto).

And this, ladies and gentlemen is something that I forgot!! How can a human being forget such an experience? This is just one of the thousand other things that ‘skip’ my mind.

I’m working on my problem sha…pray for me *halo over head*



  1. You need some herbs mehn!....for you to have forgotten this. chai!

  2. my sister!! its not even funny...please if u hav those

  3. chic u need brain help